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| Window of Pain |
When a person's life is filled with so much pain, it inhibits their ability to relate and validate the pain of others . We draw upon a metaphor of the opaque window . The darkness in the window represents unresolved pain that clouds our view of others and the outside world. It becomes a layer of ignorance which clouds our eyes. We live in a world of insensitivity, and i never understood it. We open ourselves up to the wrong people, someone who has not dealt with their own pain in life will not be empathetic, empathy requires connecting with our own pain. There are also those who won't empathize with anyone else unless it's a recognizable tragedy ( such as death) or equal to their own life tragedy. You can't compare scars, that not what they're there for. They are simply a mark of human frailty and it looks different for every person. Unfortunately, because of the window of pain people carry around, when someone tries to open up, when someone tries to heal, it becomes something which is labeled as weak. Like touching a hot stove when we reach for help from others, we get burnt. The people who carry the window of pain, can come in the form of our very own counselor, religious leader, the family member , the friend, the co-worker, people we trust and choose to be real with. We give up and label ourselves as weak. "These people come near to me with their mouth and honor me with their lips, but their hearts are far from me. Their worship of me is made up only of rules taught by men. - Isaiah 29:13. I always thought the problem was just in me, but now i realize it is really in humanity. The "window of pain" people adopt because of fear or too much pride to go to the weak place where pain exists.
No one heals without compassion. People become hardened without it. We perpetuate each others brokenness by shutting off inside. Emotions and thoughts reflect something within the heart and soul that have a need unmet. But the more we are told that what we go through doesn't matter, the worse it becomes. Moving forward, change, and growth does not occur from our trials and experiences until we can reconcile them. If we try to stuff things down by neglect our thoughts and feelings, however ugly they may be, we can't let them guide us toward understanding. To move on from experiences which cause us burden which were difficult we derive meaning , lessons, and insight into our own nature. Someone gave me this metaphor. Jesus spoke in parables and metaphors so that people would understand the message he was trying to send people. In the bible it says but these people do not know me .. their hearts are hardened, they are far away. God exists within the heart hardened their hearts--so that their eyes cannot see, and their hearts cannot understand, and they cannot turn to me and have me heal them. - John 14:20. In the process leaving those in search of healing and human connection hardened. Even those who know God turn away. But God is not people, he is above the ways of people.
God is the surgeon, have no fear you are in safe hands. God says it is okay to grieve, to struggle. In the land of pain. a lack of reliance and surrender make it difficult to stay.Without him traveling to this place of pain looks desolate, cloudy and hopeless. Why would anyone want to go there? It's doesn't look appealing to me either. Stay a little longer in this broken and empty land and you will, not only will you hear Gods voice , but not only the voice of God but the voice of people who are close to God.
" Strippin’ away the layers and reveal your soul
Got to give yourself up and then you become whole
You're a slave to yourself and you don't even know
You want to live the fast life but your brain moves slow
If you're trying to stay high, bound to stay low
You want God but you can't deflate your ego" - Matisyahu
The cost of unresolved pain takes shape in our culture. The posterior of humanity is so messed up. So far from our true nature. things like love, empathy forgiveness, communication have become an ability that not everyone has, rather than something we just DO. We, a tangled humanity that is off balanced and knotted up need grace to get there, to find our way back to the way we really need to be living. A When Jesus walked the earth he simply had this ability, because he did not hide, he was not insecure. We are addicted and constantly in need of things to consume or distract us. When we seek God out he reveals himself in a big way.
To the people. who hide behind there logic. You can do very little in life. You can't reach a broken world. A world of people in need however big or small their pain. So stop hiding behind your own window of pain and think that you shouldn't be compassionate toward others because the pain you've felt in your own life . The reason you cannot see anyone else's pain is because you are so filled with your own. Deal with your crap and let it surface. Throw your pride out the window and the walls that separate, judge, or deny the human condition .
Often times our understanding of ourselves is so limited. We have a hunch about an experience of relationship in our life that has caused us burden but we can't let it go, or we can't get out of patterns of bad habits. We carry around weight. God sees the reasons we can't let it go, and to heal us they way no other person can . It requires us one thing, complete surrender to God
Jesus was a man of truth, who saw the hypocrisy within people . It is not the stoic, proud, strong-minded, leader,counselor, advice giver, authority figure ... whoever, that heals, but the sensitive wounded healer. In the way that Jesus came to earth and experienced the pain of humanity, he did this so he could council us after his death, because he had empathy for the human condition by coming to earth. Through the holy spirit God heals and counsels as a wounded healer. God has a person hood, part of the most beautiful side of God is his intense desire to heal us.. When we sit as his feet and humble ourselves and say .. i can't and i need you.... that is when God begins to do work. We experience through God who understood human emotion and the human condition, came to the earth because he recognized our need. Even in writing this entry i have convinced my own self that this is the right way to approach life, with compassion and awareness of the inner life as mode of healing and moving forward, the world makes us second guess ourselves.
Against the world that shuts you out i hope you find God in a deep way. Every person has been through something. May God fill your unresolved wounds, empty your hands, and fill your heart once again.
